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Your infertility is hard ... you can let go of control!
Have you ever felt like absolutely nothing is within your control and that this just doesn’t happen for you?
You’ve probably been in control of most things in your life, right? Like, you’ve managed to work in a job you enjoy for a while now.
You’re enjoying some pretty good financial freedom – perhaps bought a house, a car, eating out when you like. You can buy clothes you love, and when there isn’t a pandemic to stop you, you travel a bit maybe overseas or weekends away.
You do the sporting activities you want when you want, like going to the gym, hiking, maybe skiing, running, Pilates or yoga.
You’re in a fabulous relationship with the person you know is on the same page you are with lifestyle, finances, priorities and values. Now, it’s time to start a family…. and it’s just not happening!
It. Just. Isn’t. Happening!
It’s time to take back control
Right, time to take control. You jump on the web and research like you’ve never researched before. You’ve bought every book on infertility, you’ve listened to every podcast you can find, and your nights consist of hours spent googling every fertility treatment known to humankind.
Sound familiar?
Knowledge is power, right?
You have to be fully prepared for every appointment ready to ask those all-important questions and talk with the medical team about any solutions you’ve found – no matter how weird they are.
Maybe they’ve missed something. Maybe you feel like getting pregnant just won’t happen unless you have all the information and you feel a sense of control.
You’ve always been aware of your menstrual cycle, however now it’s your key focus. You’re checking your mucus levels, know the perfect time for sex each month … and if you’re honest with yourself sex has become a bit robotic and forced. It is no longer as spontaneous or about connecting with your beloved partner; it is a means to an end.
You feel like you’ve tried it all – you’ve taken up meditation, you’re having long relaxing walks (and baths), lighting aromatherapy candles and listening to music rather than the latest news in case you activate your stress response.
You’re working so hard to not get upset with the news of another pregnancy or baby shower or christening in your close family, with friends or at work….and still nothing.
Heck, you’ve even given up alcohol (even though you’d much rather give up chocolate!) and tried every fertility diet (even though you know there is very little science showing you can really improve your fertility with food).
Just about everyone has told you to chill out about it all. “Just relax”. You’ve relaxed! God dammit…you can’t relax anymore!
And still … you aren’t pregnant
Why? How can this not be working when I’m trying so hard to do all the right things – inform myself, relax and act at the right times.?
You’ve managed to control every other part of your life to date but you just can’t control your fertility. It’s not just frustrating, it’s frightening. This lack of control is sending you into a spin – day after day, month after bleeding (literally!) month or maybe year after year. Your anxiety levels are going up, and up; you’re exhausted and you’re starting to get disillusioned. There, you said it.
This was supposed to be easy and just a matter of meeting the right person, being in the right financial position and voila you’re parents!
It is all just too hard and you’re ready to say ‘f*ck it’ and get on with your life, right? Or should you just keep trying? The conundrum is real!
Here’s a hot tip … maybe it’s time to let go of control.
Maybe, just maybe, it’s time to let someone else carry it for you, while you just be you.
What if I told you getting pregnant isn’t just a physical thing?
The truth is – your mindset also impacts your fertility.
All the stress, the grief and the worry are totally normal; but the truth is it is negatively impacting your fertility. It isn’t all physical.
So, how can the MindBody Program for Fertility help you?
Firstly, you have access one-on-one to your own personal psychologist. We’ll walk this journey together to find ways to calm your mind and in turn your body, to help you achieve your dream of having a baby.
It doesn’t matter what stage of the fertility journey you are at; the MindBody Program for Fertility will help. How?
Backed by research and supported with your own personalised psych, you not only learn about how stress impacts your fertility, your relationships and you personally, you also get to change your approach to getting pregnant, with your body, in your relationships and becoming a parent.
Together we work through the stress and stressors in your life, which are likely having a major impact on you getting pregnant or going full term. We look at your lifestyle practices, diet and supplements and supportive treatments like acupuncture.
Yes, you do get to learn meditation … these are the right ones to not just relax you but to bring on what is called the “relaxation response” to calm your mind, your body and increase your chances of a take-home baby.
So, you CAN stop googling until the wee hours. It IS possible to stop worrying about each cycle and if you have done enough this month. Putting yourself under the microscope and blaming yourself CAN end. You CAN stop the self-doubt and self-criticism that you’re not doing enough – you are enough!
Is it time to stop trying to control all aspects of your life? Is it time to live your life as it should be – with the joy, love and laughter – you’ve been looking for?
OMG! You can even go back to having joyful, playful sex whenever you want!
Do you feel like your fertility journey is defining you? If you answered yes, you aren’t alone. Learn my top five tips to take your life back.
If you’re ready to take back control and stop living your fertility learn more how you could unlock your fertility through MindBody medicine.